Post by Krypto The Superdog on Jun 8, 2013 23:20:35 GMT
This is a test piece for my fanfic/potential future RP story, Kryptoladdin, a spoof of Disney's Aladdin. Rita is the sultana of Agrabah, Brainy is Princess Jasmine, Steele is Jafar, Snooky Wookums is Iago and Krypto is Aladdin.
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Kryptoladdin Snippet
Brainy and Rita went into a large chamber, where, by chance, Steele was emerging from his chamber.
"Steele, Brainy wishes to speak with you," Rita said.
Steele shut the door, causing Snooky to get stuck as he was coming through. He looked at Brainy.
"How can I be of service, your majesty?" he asked.
"The guards just took a boy from the market on your orders," Brainy said.
Steele looked at her.
"Your parents have charged me with keeping peace in Agrabah. The boy was a criminal," he said.
"What was his crime?" Rita asked.
"Kidnapping the princess, of course," Steele answered.
Brainy frowned.
"He didn't kidnap me, I ran away!" Brainy explained.
Steele faked sad surprise.
"That is troubling. If I had only known…" he said.
"What do you mean?" Brainy asked.
"Sadly, the boy's sentence has already been carried out," Steele answered.
"What sentence?" Brainy asked.
Steele looked at her.
"Death…by beheading," he said in a sinister tone.
Tears welled up in Brainy's eyes as she gasped and fell to the floor.
"How could you?!" she shouted as she ran off crying.
Rita gave Steele a glare and followed. Meanwhile, Snooky finally got himself free. He looked at Steele.
"So, how did it go?" he asked.
Steele smiled.
"She took it…rather well," he said.
Brainy had made her way to the garden, where she sat on the side of the peacock fountain, weeping. Rita came out and sat next her. She hugged Brainy close.
"Brainy, I'm sorry," she said.
Brainy looked at her mother and buried her face into her shoulder.
"Mom, I didn't even know his name," she said, continuing to cry.
Rita was heartbroken to see her daughter like this.
"There, there, Brainy…" she said.
And for a long moment, Brainy continued to cry. For the moment, she seemed inconsolable.
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Kryptoladdin Snippet
Brainy and Rita went into a large chamber, where, by chance, Steele was emerging from his chamber.
"Steele, Brainy wishes to speak with you," Rita said.
Steele shut the door, causing Snooky to get stuck as he was coming through. He looked at Brainy.
"How can I be of service, your majesty?" he asked.
"The guards just took a boy from the market on your orders," Brainy said.
Steele looked at her.
"Your parents have charged me with keeping peace in Agrabah. The boy was a criminal," he said.
"What was his crime?" Rita asked.
"Kidnapping the princess, of course," Steele answered.
Brainy frowned.
"He didn't kidnap me, I ran away!" Brainy explained.
Steele faked sad surprise.
"That is troubling. If I had only known…" he said.
"What do you mean?" Brainy asked.
"Sadly, the boy's sentence has already been carried out," Steele answered.
"What sentence?" Brainy asked.
Steele looked at her.
"Death…by beheading," he said in a sinister tone.
Tears welled up in Brainy's eyes as she gasped and fell to the floor.
"How could you?!" she shouted as she ran off crying.
Rita gave Steele a glare and followed. Meanwhile, Snooky finally got himself free. He looked at Steele.
"So, how did it go?" he asked.
Steele smiled.
"She took it…rather well," he said.
Brainy had made her way to the garden, where she sat on the side of the peacock fountain, weeping. Rita came out and sat next her. She hugged Brainy close.
"Brainy, I'm sorry," she said.
Brainy looked at her mother and buried her face into her shoulder.
"Mom, I didn't even know his name," she said, continuing to cry.
Rita was heartbroken to see her daughter like this.
"There, there, Brainy…" she said.
And for a long moment, Brainy continued to cry. For the moment, she seemed inconsolable.